Mawage, that bwessed awangment, that dweam wifin a dweam...

A lot of my friends have been posting this article on facebook this past week:

http://m.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationship/features/27749-you-never-marry-the-right-person 

It's definitely worth taking the time to read. The article is titled "You never marry the right person." To sum it up, it talks about how you never really know the person you're marrying, even if you think you do. 

Duke University Ethics professor Stanley Hauerwas said it this way:

"We never know whom we marry; we just think we do. Or even if we first marry the right person, just give it a while and he or she will change. For marriage, being [the enormous thing it is] means we are not the same person after we have entered it. The primary challenge of marriage is learning how to love and care for the stranger to whom you find yourself married."

This made me think about when Ben and I decided to get married. I had moved back to Tyler from Japan in July 2007. I quickly started trying to restore an old relationship with someone that was not good for me. It never really happened, and in the end I just felt hurt and confused. That was over in January 2008. 
I began praying daily for God to bring me someone that would love me like Christ loves the church. I was not in a hurry to get married, but I definitely did not want to feel like I had been feeling. I thought I had the "perfect" idea of a mate in my head. Just like most people, I wanted to find "the one." I didn't even know if that was possible, but I did know that if I trusted Christ, he would protect my heart. That is what I continually asked for: my heart to be protected.  In March 2008, Ben and I decided to take a road trip to visit our friend, Taylor. At this point, Ben and I were just friends. We had been friends since the summer of 2001, and had a long history. That trip was a lot of fun, but when it was over, I didn't think I was falling in love with Ben. I definitely liked him, but I was really focused on protecting my heart. I did not want my heart to be broken or hurt.
I left our trip and went to Arizona to spend time with some friends from Japan. On March 12, 2008, I had a moment in my life that I almost felt like God spoke audibly to me. I was at a Young Life camp near the Grand Canyon, laying in a bunk bed. I continued to pray what I prayed most nights--that God would bring someone in my life that would love me like Christ loved the church. I very clearly felt like God said to me, "It's Ben." I realize that God did not actually speak out loud to me, but I heard it. It was not my imagination. 
At that moment, I thought, "well, what does this mean now?" I mean, Ben had not shown any interest in me up to that point other than a friend. I realized that just because God spoke, that did not mean immediate results. However, the next evening, Ben called me. He told me he couldn't wait to talk to me when I got back home.
I returned home on the 14th, and Ben called and asked me to go out with him. We drove out to the South Campus and sat and looked at the stars and talked. We realized that God was bringing us together. It wasn't anything we could have done on our own. His hand was in it each step of the way. 
Now, I'm not saying everything has been perfect. We definitely fight and argue, but ultimately, we are in this for long haul. Marriage is hard. It's designed that way. We all desire to be known, but we can't ever completely be known by anyone but Christ. 
I'm incredibly thankful for Ben. I'm thankful that the Lord brought us together. I'm thankful that if I am going to go through something as hard as marriage, it is with him.